Positive Parenting: Listen to Me...

"Listen to me ...” is what many parents often find themselves saying to their children. However, what happens when it's the parent who's not listening to the child? This week’s positive parenting focuses on parents' need to actively listen to their children.

Many parents place demands on their children without hearing them out. As a parent, you will find that you need to listen attentively to what your child is and is not saying. Body language speaks volumes, as do pitch and tone. When you are listening to your child, be aware of your own body language, pitch and tone. 

Additionally, you need to understand the value of being honest and up front with your kid. For example, if you child caught you at a bad time, offer a better time to speak with them. That way you will be genuinely tuned in to what they have to say.

Be careful not to prejudge your kid’s thoughts or feelings by basing your opinion of what they have to say on either how you thought, acted and reacted when you were their age, or on how people say a child should think, feel or act.

Does this mean that you need to relinquish your “parental power”?   No. It's actually empowering you to be the great listener you're showing your child to be. Every parent wants the best for his child, but part of bringing that “best” to fruition is being able to listen, and try to understand where your child is coming from on a particular issue.

By listening, you open up your child to the worlds of perception and individuality in addition to the wonderful world of compromise. All of these concepts are something that you as a parent lay the foundation for. While you don't necessarily have to agree with your child, you can at least let him or her express thoughts, feelings and opinions.

The next time you say “listen to me” to your child, remember that you need to reciprocate your request.