Carney Couple Celebrates 50 Years

They met while working together at the social security office in Woodlawn. The year was 1961.

She was a 17-year-old city girl fresh out of Eastern High School. He was a 20-year-old county boy from Woodstock, a small town in northern Howard County.

"When she walked by I said, 'Daaamn,'" Herb Crum said of the first time he saw his future wife, Pat Sousa.

They can't remember their first date. They playfully argued about it as we recently sat at the kitchen table of their Carney home. Maybe they went and got a hamburger, Pat said, more asking than telling.

While maybe their first date wasn't memorable, it must have made an impression—just six months later, on June 10, 1961, they were married in a ceremony at St. Dominic's Church in Hamilton.

They lived together in an apartment on Bayonne Avenue in Hamilton and bought their first house about a year later on nearby Lillian Avenue. Relatives were skeptical.

"They gave us a year," Herb said.

"Yeah, nobody thought it was going to last then," Pat added.

Not only did they survive, they quickly grew as a family.

Pat stayed at home with their newborn daughter Teresa. And a year later, their son Butch was born.

She eventually went back to work as the executive secretary to the vice president of nursing at St. Joseph's Medical Center. Herb worked for 29 years as a firefighter in Baltimore.

They've seen a lot in 50 years of marriage.

When they first moved to Carney in May 1972, St. Isaac Jogues parish had just been built. There was no Pine Grove Middle School and much of the area that is now Perry Hall was still farmland.

Through their half-century together, the couple enjoyed successful careers, raised a family and welcomed a granddaughter. But they also endured one of the greatest tragedies for parents: the loss of their daughter. Terry died of lymphoma in 1990.

Through it all they've stayed together.

The couple celebrated their golden anniversary with a small party for friends and family held in the fellowship hall at Christus Victor Lutheran Church.

The secret to a long and happy marriage?

"It's a rose garden with a bunch of briars," said Herb, 70. "And you need a few Band-Aids, I guess."

"You take what comes," said Pat, 68. "It's all you can do."